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Ben’s Harbor Freight Poem

Ben, a customer of ours, stopped by the other day to read us a poem he had written. Enjoy!

We do not like no harbor freight
We do not like it after 8
We do not like it when we’re late
We do not like it in a bind
Especially not when work’s behind

We do not like it in a box
You’re better off just using rocks
Their tools just break right in your hand
Which doesn’t work, when there’s demand…
for jobs done well and done up right.
With harbor freight you’ll have a fight

I and my co-workers concur
Harry Epstein’s we prefer
Their tools are made to pass the test
Into the trash with all the rest
Kennedy boxes are bullet proof…
from basements to the top of roofs

At 8th and Central I declare
You will find the hardest ware
To make your labor bear its fruit
And one more thing I’ll add, to boot…
To keep your hunger pains away
Phoenix lunch across the way

Caption Contest Winner!

The winner of the caption contest is…drum roll please…. “jeremy v” from garagejournal! Congratulations Jeremy, your caption is going out to 500 unsuspecting Epstein’s customers. Check in next month for another chance to win.

Type 187 Cobalt Weldout Spotweld Bit

Type 187 Cobalt Weldout Spotweld bit

These mean little stubby spotweld bits can take care of all your automotive spot welds. Cobalt hardness. Spur point. US (Union made) in Minnesota. Comes in 8MM and 10MM.

Lugall Med. & Light Frame Cable Hoists

Lugall Medium and LIght frame cable hoists

Just in! Check out these medium and light duty frame cable hoists from Lugall. US made. Tough stuff.

Lonnie & Lilly

Picture courtesy of Lonnie AKA Snidely Whiplash AKA the man in the striped overalls.

Our Phones Are Working Again!

UPDATE: Our phones are fixed! Call us and let us know what’s been going on this last couple of days.

Our phone lines are currently not working today because apparently AT&T doesn’t really care whether we have working phone lines. :) If you are needing to get a hold of us please email us at: Hopefully everything will be back up and running tomorrow. Sorry for the inconvenience. We are currently wading through the purgatory-like abyss of dealing with telecommunications companies. So how has your day been?

HJE Caption Contest

Welcome to the first ever HJE Caption Contest. Here’s how you play. Look at the image above. Really look at it. Now close your eyes and think of a funny caption. Are your eyes closed? Probably not because you are still reading this. Once you have your favorite caption, enter it in the comments section with your name. Or, if you are shy and don’t want your name associated with your sense of humor, you can also use an ALIAS. We will read through all the submissions and pick a winner.

A glossy postcard will be printed and inserted in all HJE orders for a month with the winning caption (along with your name/ALIAS). That’s right. You could be famous. Your witty caption will go out to a whole bunch of slightly confused customers that don’t quite understand why they have received a postcard with their order. It will be fun! All it takes is a little brain power, a little luck and a little caption.

If you are wondering where this image came from, it was created by the hardest working man in the art business Charlie Mylie. You might remember Charlie as the guy that did a lot of the Epstein’s Day box art requests. Charlie doesn’t want to work for “the man” but he does like working for us, so we are glad to support him in his quest to be a professional artist. Charlie also has a website. Check it out, and contact him, if you want him to draw something for you sometime.

Happy SK Day!

Picked up our SK Day t-shirts this morning. Thanks La Cucaracha for staying up late and printing them last night. If you have any t-shirt printing needs, check them out here:

What is SK day you might ask? Well, for starters, all SK merchandise is discounted for today and tomorrow from 5 to 20%. That is exactly 2,836 brand new discounted SK items. For more info you can check out the thread that started it all on garagejournal here.

SK Day T-Shirt Design

HJE Hard Hat Stickers

They’re not just for hard hats! You can stick them on anything! The circular saw blade was originally painted by my Aunt Nancy for Harry J. Epstein’s birthday. Classic design. Hope Target doesn’t sue us. Yeah stickers!